Circling

Been reading Nuar Alsadir’s Animal Joy (a present from a friend who knows how much I like animals, joy and animal joy also).

Very timely for me because I’ve been thinking a lot about aliveness in creative work and how trying to fit things into a pre-formulated structure can kill them. This is particularly true of stand-up, I think, which thrives on the relationship between performer, audience and context, but it’s also true of everything else (scriptwriting, prose, poetry, this). Although TV screenwriting is bordering on an exception because of the importance of robust narrative structure you still have to find a way to preserve aliveness or you end up with what Alsadir calls a “fake poem” (or in this case a fake show).

Sometimes I think about it in terms of the difference between “what I want to say” and “what wants to be said through me.”

Prose is particularly unforgiving in this respect because it lives or dies on rhythm and its ability to evoke fresh and authentic patterns of thought and emotion. The slightest whiff that something’s prefabricated and the whole thing starts feeling like a theatre set you want to smash through like a bored actor (and often as a writer this is the right thing to do).

I think it can also exist on social media eg “the fake post” that’s designed to appeal to the audience but isn’t alive. I noticed during the time I was posting a lot that it is often this quality of aliveness that makes things go viral (as well as novelty and cleverness and all the other more obvious products of rat-like cunning).

Alsadir also uses the word “anti-strategic” for the most instinctive forms of laughter. I like that because it describes what I like about not just laughter but most things that don’t make living feel like a mechanical exercise in survival (smoking cigarettes, self-sabotage, graffiti).

Tldr – stop making sense.

Something I read…

Here’s a poem about penises

https://granta.com/two-poems-mcmillan/

Something else I read…

While we’re on the subject (from Jung’s Memories, Dreams, Reflections)

Something I did…

My play, Dear Martin, starts at the Arcola, east London, next month and now’s a good time to buy tickets.

It’s about a psychopath and his unlikely friendship with the man he’s cucking, making it the perfect activity for a first date or, failing that, an uncomfortable works outing.

Also, I’ll be doing a stand-up work-in-progress show on at the Leicester Comedy Festival on 12th February called Michael Made Me Do It which is all about the joys of being anti-strategic. Come and take part in something that I hope, like this newsletter, will be chaotic but enjoyable.

Something I found…

Speaking of antistrategy, big fan of the genre that is “unnecessarily creative Amazon review”.

Sold.

Something I liked…

Been reading Rachel Cusk’s Parade. She writes especially brilliantly about self-hatred.

“Like a dog slinking back to a cruel master, she came at the call of his disgust.” Oof!

Also…

I’m on Bluesky now. For how long… who knows? But come hang out and exchange pictures of David Byrne with me while the party lasts. I’m also posting more on Instagram until that gets nuked on a whim, so why not join me?

Probably lots of reasons. But don’t let those trouble you.

That’s it for now. Byeeeeeeee!